The most deeply rooted limiting belief that has anchored me to the traumas of my past is this: I am not fully seen, valued, loved, respected, or appreciated for exactly who I truly am. I need to meet other people’s expectations to be loved and accepted. Therefore, unless I HAVE to say something that’s bothering me, I should just figure out how to handle it independently. Sharing things that the other person might not agree with, do the same way, or also desire, could cause judgment, disengagement, and leave me with no source in which I could receive love.

Believing this has held me hostage in my own mind. Time and time again, I have held my own tongue when a want or need came up, simply to appease another person’s desires to look good in their eyes or to not be a burden on them.

In the past, when I didn’t share my own thoughts, feelings, or approaches to tasks, I stifled or downplayed, or at the very least ignored my value. By not voicing my needs or concerns, I was passive and I willingly, yet unknowingly, placed myself in the control of others. Should they show me love, I would think I had done the right thing. Should they show me hostility, I would think I had done the wrong thing. Doing or saying the right thing meant I was valuable and doing or saying the wrong thing meant I didn’t have value to add or perhaps that I had even made situations worse.

I told myself that I stayed quiet out of respect for the other person. Although in all actuality, I did this out of a belief that denying my own needs and adopting someone else’s needs or ways of operation, would mean that I would be loved. I have feared that speaking up would mean judgment or condemnation from others. It seems easier and less painful to go with the ways other are presenting as expectations when doing the opposite would threaten your connection with others.

Judgment, disengagement, and separation from our connection to feeling love – it’s the oldest trick in the book. Both masculine and feminine polarities have become separated from Source. For some period of time, people were hurting and were struggling to feel good, searching for that deep and loving relationship. Stepping into Christ Consciousness will change things for these people because that consciousness is the quality that can restore the connection between humans and Source on a quantum level.

Sometimes I forget that I’m not disconnected from my source of love anymore.

Sometimes I forget that I am so fully and deeply seen, valued, loved, respected, and appreciated.

Sometimes I forget that I have already been accepted into the most incredible family – that of humanity.

Sometimes I forget that I can trust this relationship.

Sometimes I forget that I don’t have to settle for just surviving, but that I am so beyond blessed to have both today and eternity to live into my cocreated kingdom.

Here’s to remembering. Here’s to speaking up. Here’s to myself – for not leaving me behind, and for helping me to follow truth, even when I pretend to be okay, passively letting other people lead my life. Here’s to repeating the process with more confidence the next time that old limiting belief tries to sneak back in ?

Happy New Year.